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Supporting Kids: Big Emotions

Supporting Your Kids (and Yourself) Through Big Emotions

The holiday season can be magical, and for many families, it can also be a whirlwind of emotions, packed schedules, and expectations. In my work with children and parent coaching, many of my client’s parents have asked me something along the lines of, “How can I best support my child when they’re feeling overwhelmed or dysregulated?” This question has come up more recently due to the busy season, so here are some effective strategies* to help your child–and yourself– navigate moments of dysregulation with care and connection. 

Prioritize Self-Care as a Parent

Parenting can be exhausting, especially during the holidays. Give yourself permission to take a break when you need it:

  • Slow down and let go of some of the extra commitments.

  • Say no to that 12th cookie exchange invitation.

  • Play and rest alongside your kids.

Giving yourself grace is one of the best gifts you can offer your family. When you’re more regulated, you’re better able to help your kids navigate their own big feelings.

Find Connection Through Play

Play is one of the most effective ways to support a child’s emotional well-being. It uses their developmental skills and strengthens your bond. And, laughter and fun are great stress-relievers for you, too!

  • Build a fort together.

  • Play a silly holiday game.

  • Have a mini dance party in your living room.

Even short bursts of play can do wonders for your child’s mood and help you both reconnect during busy days or moments of overwhelm.

Ground Your Family in Nature

Being in nature helps us feel grounded, regulates our nervous system, and improves our mood. Bring play outside or go for a walk, even if it’s just around the block. You might point out the sensory details to bring you and your child’s attention to the present moment:

  • The crunch of leaves or snow underfoot.

  • The chill of the wind or the warmth of the sun.

  • The smell of trees or the sound of birds.

Help Your Child Feel Understood

When your child is upset, they may not yet have the words to describe what they’re feeling. This is where you come in. Try naming the emotion you see:

  • “I’m hearing that you’re feeling really frustrated because the game isn’t going the way you wanted.”

  • “It looks like you’re sad because we had to leave the party early.”

  • "It seems like you're feeling scared because of the loud noise we just heard."

Naming the emotion helps your child feel seen and understood, which can calm their nervous system and open the door to co-regulation. Acknowledging their feelings doesn’t mean you have to fix the situation; it’s about letting them know their emotions are valid and manageable.

Use the Power of the Senses

When your child is dysregulated, having sensation-based activities on hand or in mind can be a game-changer. Focusing on the five senses can help your child release pent-up energy or slow down, depending on what they need, and it can ground you both in the present moment.

  • Sight: Watch a calming video, look at holiday lights, or do a coloring activity.

  • Sound: Listen to their favorite music, hum a tune together, or play with a rain stick.

  • Taste: Sip hot chocolate, enjoy a crunchy snack, or suck on a peppermint candy.

  • Smell: Sniff a scented candle, use essential oils, or bake cookies.

  • Touch: Play with legos, squish playdough, or snuggle under a cozy blanket.

I suggest making a list that gives you quick options to support your child when emotions are running high.

Create Space for Grief, Transitions, and Memories

Holidays often stir up memories of loved ones we've lost or traditions that have shifted. It’s okay for you and your child to feel a mix of emotions.

  • Acknowledge the loss or transition by talking about it openly:

  • “I know we’re both really missing Grandma today.”

  • “It’s been hard not having everyone together for the holidays like we used to.”

  • “I can tell this change has been tough. I’m here if you want to talk about it.”

  • Create a ritual: 

  • Light a candle in memory of someone special

  • Write a note or draw a picture for someone you miss 

  • Share memories and stories 

  • Say a prayer together 

  • Balance this with moments of joy and relaxation: 

  • Watch a holiday movie 

  • Decorate cookies together

  • Have a cozy game night or craft night 

Honoring grief, transitions, or loss doesn’t have to be complicated—it’s about making space for what you feel while also allowing room for connection and healing.

The holidays don’t have to be perfect to be meaningful. By showing up for your kids with curiosity, empathy, and a little playfulness, you’re giving them tools to manage their emotions—not just during the holidays, but for life. And when you give yourself permission to slow down and rest, you model self-compassion and resilience, which is one of the greatest gifts of all.

*This blog draws inspiration from a resource created by Lindsey Krogh, LCSW, Registered Play Therapist.

If you’re navigating parenthood or would like additional support for your child, there’s a team of Marriage and Family Therapists at Root to Rise Therapy who are happy to walk alongside you and your family. Contact our Client Care Coordinator to schedule your first session!


Warmly,

Sophia Rodriguez, AMFT


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