A common struggle for many of my clients in their 20s is navigating friendships. This includes friendship conflicts, growing apart, reassessing the closeness of the friendship, and defining what types of friendships feel fulfilling in which ones feel draining. 

In these conversations, we explore the importance of flexibility in friendships and why it becomes so much more pertinent during this life stage. As we begin to solidify our identity beyond the scope of our peers, we begin to intertwine it with our careers, relations to family members as adults, geographical locations, hobbies, personal interests, personality traits, and so much more. We start to build a clearer sense-of-self and, sometimes, this becomes incompatible with friendships we have. 

Flexibility in friendships allows each person to grow separately and together simultaneously. It is an essential component of friendships that can stand the test of time.

How to identify if there is flexibility in your friendship:

Space is Allowed

Didn’t respond to a text right away? Don’t want to go to that event because you want some time to decompress? These things do not feel like a jeopardization of the friendship and are not taken personally.

Honoring Differences and Celebrating Commonalities 

Commonalities are usually the foundations of friendships, yet as we get to know ourselves and others, we can find the differences to add to the dynamic of the friendship. For example, if one of you is an extrovert and the other is an introvert, there is no forcing one to be more like another, rather a focus on what makes the connection meaningful, adaptable, cooperative, and fun!

Boundaries are Respected

If you start to feel yourself entering a different chapter of your life where you like to go out less and your friend still enjoys nights out, there is no judgement or pressure. You find other ways to spend quality time together to nurture the friendship.

If you are currently in a stage where you are navigating your friendships, you can reach out to our client care coordinator today to find the right therapist to support your journey towards maintaining and cultivating meaningful connections.

Warmly,

Atalie Abramovici, LMFT