When thinking about positive affirmations, what comes to your mind? Do you cringe at the thought of standing in front of the mirror and complimenting yourself? Do you feel yourself saying, “I’ll never believe these statements.”
Before diving into the science behind positive affirmations, I encourage you to read my previous blog about the inner critic. In it, I discuss how core beliefs develop and influence the critical statements you might say to yourself, but most importantly, I discuss how being critical of yourself is a learned behavior. That being said, if it can be learned, it can be unlearned and replaced with more positive behaviors.
The brain is subconsciously wired to look for threats, which makes complete sense…evolutionarily. That sound from the bushes could be a cute bunny (Aw!), but it also COULD BE A BEAR! When this is wired subconsciously, it influences the conscious thought process to activate a mental filter and only take in information that proves those messages to be true.
Try an exercise right now. Close your eyes and think about the last few times someone complimented you. When was it? Who said this to you? What was the context? Now, do the same for an insult or criticism. It might have been a lot easier to think about those details for an insult, right? An insult or criticism feels like a threat to your identity, so of course, it’s going to feel like it holds more weight than a compliment. The truth is they hold the same amount of weight. If you believe an insult, you have to allow yourself to believe a compliment. But again, we are not wired that way, so it takes a lot of practice!
By practicing positive affirmations, you can bring these more positive views of yourself and the world to conscious awareness and “hijack” your mental filter to pay attention to evidence that makes these affirmations feel true. Remember that thoughts influence how you feel and how you behave. If you have the thought that “My art sucks and I will never be good enough,” that can lead to feelings of depression and discourage you from engaging in an activity you find enjoyable. However, if you were to change that to “I love art, and I am going to practice and get better every day,” you might feel more motivated and continue working at it.
Beginning this practice
Identify a specific area in your life that you’re looking to improve. This could be improving your confidence, fostering body positivity, improving your creativity, etc.
Create 5-10 affirmations focusing on that area.
Set a timer for 5 minutes and write down as many positive affirmations as you can think of.
Don’t criticize yourself! Just write what comes to mind.
When the timer goes off, pick 5-10 that stick out to you and that you find particularly inspiring and motivating. Ask yourself:
Does this sound better in the first or third person? (“I” versus “Marissa)
Do I want to use the present or future tense? (“I am” versus “I will”)
Integrate them into your daily life or routine.
Write them on a sticky note that you can stick to your mirror.
Repeat them to yourself 5-10 times in the morning or at night
Recite them inside your mind.
Speak them out loud.
Write them down on a piece of paper.
Combine them with an activity like yoga or stretching.
Make them your phone or computer wallpaper.
Set a reminder on your phone to engage in this practice.
Make a vision board with these affirmations and hang it up in your space.
Keep them in the notes app on your phone as a place you can turn to when you need the extra boost.
Engage in 10 minutes of conscious practice a day.
Examples:
“I am getting better every day.”
“Failure is how I learn and grow from my mistakes.”
“May I be kind to myself.”
“I will not put energy toward things outside of my control.”
“I will be more understanding toward others.”
“I love and accept myself.”
“I am open to the endless possibilities of the day.”
For those struggling with self-image, specifically body-image issues, affirmations around the body can feel very triggering and challenging. Try starting off with body neutrality statements. You can then move up to gratitude statements and eventually work your way up to positive affirmations. Meet yourself where you are at and be kind to yourself.
Examples of (my own) body neutrality statements:
“I have brown hair.”
“I have 2 legs.”
“I have 10 fingers.”
Examples of gratitude statements:
“I am grateful for my arms because they helped me eat my bowl of cereal for breakfast.”
“I am grateful for my feet for supporting me during a long walk.”
“I am grateful for my hands that allow me to pet my cats’ soft fur!”
Examples of positive affirmations surrounding the body:
“I love the way my hair looks today.”
“I make this shirt look so good!”
“My smile lights up a room!”
Sources: https://www.theemotionmachine.com/
If you’re interested in learning more about how to immerse yourself in this practice and engage in self-compassion, the therapists at Root to Rise are here to help! Contact our Client Coordinator to find out which therapist would be best suited for your needs.
Warmly,
Root to Rise Therapy
