In movies and TV shows, we are exposed to fictional therapists who play a major or minor role in character development and plot. We have met therapists on the screen who are better than others, some representing more accurately the actual therapist-client relationship and some feeling completely unethical.
Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) is a term often tossed around casually. You’ve probably heard someone say, “I’m so OCD” about organizing their desk or arranging their bookshelf. But OCD is so much more than a preference for tidiness or a quirky habit. It’s a mental health condition that can feel overwhelming and exhausting, often making everyday life an uphill battle. Let’s take a closer look at what OCD really is and how it can show up in people’s lives.
Here’s the thing: too much screen time is draining our mental energy, increasing our stress, and keeping us from actually enjoying (real) life. As a therapist, I see the impact of this all the time—our devices are disconnecting us from what really matters: ourselves, our relationships, and our well-being. So, this New Year, I’m personally challenging YOU (and myself) to a 30-Day Digital Detox.
In my work with children and parent coaching, many of my client’s parents have asked me something along the lines of, “How can I best support my child when they’re feeling overwhelmed or dysregulated?” This question has come up more recently due to the busy season, so here are some effective strategies* to help your child–and yourself– navigate moments of dysregulation with care and connection.
Life presents us with challenges–that is inevitable. Over the course of my life, I have witnessed immense resilience in people from my culture which presents as strikingly superhuman at times. However, certain key components and practices build this resounding resilience over time.
All in all, the holiday seasons can bring a myriad of mixed emotions. Supporting your sense of self with a daily gratitude practice can help the holidays feel more easeful and potentially become a practice you bring with you into the new year! If you need extra support during this time, please get in touch with our Client Care Coordinator at Root to Rise to book an appointment with one of our therapists today!
Have you ever made lofty goals for the new year and then been disappointed when you stopped pursuing these goals after just a few weeks? Or have you fallen short of what you imagined you would do?
I used to make goals for the new year to symbolize the new me. I would then lose steam, take a break from the plan, and not return for weeks, months, or sometimes until the following year. If I did achieve the goal, the outcome would not match the fantasy in my mind.
In my recent sessions, clients have been telling me that they are constantly playing catch-up, falling behind, or feeling like they are failing. When I ask them to explore what makes them feel this way, I’m usually met with statements such as, “Well, my coworker Sasha can complete five tasks in the time it takes me to complete one. I feel like I should be doing more.” Ah ha! There it is–we live in a society where we are constantly being compared to others, so it’s no wonder we find ourselves doing the same thing internally.
My professor made a poignant remark during the days leading up to the fall and winter holidays that had the entire class laughing at the accuracy and relatability of the observation. He shared that the holidays are a humbling time for personal growth because you can think you have worked through and resolved most of your triggers in therapy until that first fall holiday family get-together.
Living in Los Angeles, even with its desirable year-round weather, presents mood challenges as the seasons turn.I know fall has arrived and we are heading towards winter when there is a subtle yet palpable shift in the weather: the sun begins to set earlier; a cold, crisp quality permeates the air; I start reaching for the jackets that have been at the back of my closet; I am exponentially more drawn to turning on my furnace instead of the AC unit as each day passes. I also experience an indistinct shift in my moods as the days get shorter and the nights grow longer.
When it comes to taking steps on your life path, you often hear people urging you to “follow your gut.” But what exactly does that mean? And if you aren’t following our gut, what are you following?
You have two choices: to primarily listen to either your ego or your intuitive inner voice. So how do you differentiate between the two? How do you know if you are “trusting your gut” or following an ego-driven desire?
Here are 5 quick and easy tools to calm the sympathetic nervous system and activate the parasympathetic nervous system when feeling dysregulated.
I have heard people speak before about this concept of believing that they are ‘too much’ when it comes to relationships. This belief can keep people self-rejecting, negatively spiraling, and making rules like "I should keep who I am all to myself and shut down because I am too much." It is a distancing fear-based act that signals sympathetic flight mode, which puts the nervous system in a place of stress where the hypothalamus that regulates mood, sleep, hunger, and thirst in the brain activates the adrenal glands which releases about 30 stress hormones. As a result, the body slows digestion, increases heart rate, shortens breath, and constricts muscles. These beliefs, rules, emotional, and physical responses can lead to a perpetual pattern of isolating and closing off from relationships.
If I asked you to name a vulnerable emotion, joy doesn’t present as the obvious answer. Instead, we tend to think about shame, loneliness, anger, anxiety, and other more traditionally “negative” emotions. So how is joy potentially the most vulnerable emotion we experience? Brene Brown answers this question in her research about foreboding joy, which she defines as: “the experience of joy immediately followed by worry or dread.”
So many of us have experienced this confusing phenomenon of mixed emotions without an understanding as to what or why this is happening internally. The feeling is so widespread that many idioms have attempted to illustrate this particular experience: have you ever thought, “This is too good to be true” or experienced the feeling of “waiting for the other shoe to drop?” I know I have experienced this long before I had a name for it. I remember one particular instance where I was looking over at my partner with love and awe, only to have the feeling transform into fears about the end of the relationship and how devastated I would feel. I also remember the intense negative self-judgment I experienced, becoming frustrated that I couldn’t enjoy a good thing and had to ruin it with these intrusive thoughts. Learning about foreboding joy has been illuminating and validating when thinking back on these memories.
I hear this same self-talk in therapy sessions every day. I have clients who describe not wanting to get too excited about a new relationship, not wanting to settle into a sense of calm at a new job, and generally not wanting to let their guard down in case the positive experience doesn’t last. So, why do we do this? Why does dread often follow joy?
