How To Support A Loved One Struggling With Their Mental Health
As someone with limited athletic ability and no cable subscription, sports, in particular tennis and gymnastics, have never been a big part of my life. This year, however, Naomi Osaka and Simone Biles changed that. Their bravery in bringing mental health into the dialogue highlighted the incongruence between how we may assume someone is feeling and their internal world. This year, I cared about sports.
Simone Biles and Naomi Osaka, two of the most celebrated and talented athletes of our generation, demonstrated an action that is largely unprecedented in the world of athleticism and fame: they put their mental health first. Too often, we look at these athletes with almost superhuman abilities as immune to human conditions. Their openness about the pressures they face, their anxieties, their confusion about their identity, and their general wellbeing created the space for a more open conversation about something so many of us experience: the desire to appear a certain way externally despite what we are feeling internally. If they can be honest about their struggles, we can too.
In the days following them pulling out of events due to their mental health, my social media feeds were flooded with messages of support and compassion. Since the conversation had already been started, people felt comfortable voicing their advocacy and sharing their own experiences. Now, a few weeks later, the dialogue has dwindled. I am grateful for their courage which allowed us to begin the conversation, but the work is far from over. Long-term change starts with supporting people in our own lives and opening up the conversation of destigmatizing mental health in our own communities. Here’s how you can support loved ones struggling with their mental health:
1. Know when to talk and when to listen:
If someone trusts you with their feelings and their vulnerabilities, be appreciative. This is not an easy conversation for many people, but knowing that someone is there to just listen makes it safer and easier. Try not to shy away from the conversation. Ask the people you love how they are and really listen to the answer.
2. Know your limits and respect boundaries:
Support and love are necessary for progress but remember that you can only do so much. Make sure this person knows that you are there for support when they are ready to receive it and recognize that they may not be ready yet.
3. Encourage therapy or other levels of care:
Even though you love and support them, they may need the help of a professional. Remind family and friends that help is available, and do what you can to assist them in the process if you have the resources and ability.
4. Ask questions:
If you’re not sure if someone who is struggling with their mental health would want to be invited to lunch or plans, ask them! Even if the answer is no, it feels good to be included.
5. Demonstrate compassion and kindness.
This one applies to everyone no matter what someone is experiencing. Being kind and compassionate goes a long way, and remember that it all starts with you! Cultivating compassion for ourselves is one of the key ways to be compassionate with others.
6. Get your own support!
At Root to Rise therapy, we specialize in providing care for those who are used to caring for others. In order to care for others and be a supportive friend and ally, you need to have your own space to process your feelings.
The bravery of these athletes to be open about their mental health encouraged a more open dialogue that allowed us all to share our own struggles. Now, it is on us to continue the conversation.
If you are feeling called to authentically open up about any struggles you are having, schedule a free consultation call today to get started. We know how hard it can be to ask for help. We aim to provide a safe and supportive space for you, whenever you are ready.
Warmly,
Jessica Leader, AMFT
Root to Rise Therapy
