The Animal Within: Unpacking Personality Types for Better Friendships
The other day, while reconnecting with a small group of friends, I found myself chuckling and closely observing the dynamic. Danielle was in the spotlight as usual, excitedly sharing the latest details of her wild sexual escapades from the previous night. Tony raised an eyebrow, delivering her stern but honest advice: “Danielle, we’ve been over this: you have the worst taste in men. You need to be more careful. Do I need to supervise you?” Meanwhile, Cecilia shot me a side-eye, as if telepathically saying, “Not this again.” She quickly changed the subject with one of her quick-witted jokes.
As for me, I was quietly taking it all in, waiting for my turn to chime in. I do enjoy socializing, but I’ve become more aware of myself in these situations. Sometimes I wonder, “Did the pandemic make me less outgoing? Why do I always tend to be the silent one in the group?” While some people thrive in the spotlight or take the initiative to plan big outings, I often sit quietly, smiling to myself and only offering my two cents when it feels absolutely necessary.
Then, I recently stumbled upon the concept of animal chronotypes, which can be used to describe our personality traits based on our natural tendencies in social interactions and behavior. While these archetypes are often linked to sleep habits, they’re also super helpful for understanding how we connect with others. Each chronotype has its own unique traits and ways of navigating relationships. Let’s dive into the animal-inspired personality types: lions, owls, peacocks, and dolphins. See which one resonates with you!
The LION: The confident, assertive leader
As a lion, you naturally take charge in social situations, thriving on structure and direct communication. At your best, you’re the ultimate friend—protective, supportive, and inspiring. You tend to initiate friendships and enjoy being in control of social dynamics. Your straightforwardness leads to honest conversations, and your charisma and enthusiasm light up any gathering. However, you might sometimes come off as intimidating or overly intense, inadvertently dominating conversations or unintentionally sidelining others. Additionally, showing vulnerability can be tough for you, which might create distance and make it harder for friends to connect on a deeper level.
Tips for Lions: While your assertiveness is a strength, try to approach social interactions with openness. Create space for others to share their thoughts, and be mindful of your body language—try a relaxed posture and a warm smile to appear more approachable. Although your leadership qualities are admirable, showing vulnerability by sharing your own experiences can foster deeper connections with others. Lastly, remember to balance your tendency to take charge by welcoming the contributions of your friends and being mindful of how your words might affect them. This helps them feel valued and included in the dynamic.
The OWL: The introspective, analytical observer
As an owl, you are a deep thinker who values introspection and meaningful conversations. You often prefer to listen and observe before diving into discussions. At your best, you create strong bonds through your thoughtful insights, making you a loyal and empathetic friend. Your loyalty and authenticity make you a cherished confidant, and your strength in offering valuable advice helps others navigate their challenges. However, you may come off as aloof or reserved, leaving friends wanting more of your playful side. Your tendency to overthink can lead to hesitation in sharing your thoughts, making others feel like they don’t truly know you.
Tips for Owls: While your introspective nature is a strength, try to be more open and spontaneous. Don’t hesitate to share your thoughts, as your insights are valuable and can spark great conversations. Make an effort to engage in lighter topics, allowing for fun and relaxed exchanges that help others feel comfortable around you. Remember that vulnerability can strengthen your connections, so practice sharing more about yourself. Lastly, practice being more proactive in initiating plans; this can help you step out of your comfort zone and bring your friends closer to you.
The PEACOCK: The expressive, charismatic socializer
As a peacock, you’re the life of the party, brimming with energy. You thrive in social settings and draw people in with your charisma and warmth. At your best, your fun-loving, uplifting, and expressive nature can light up any room with vibrance. However, you can sometimes come off as superficial or overly focused on seeking attention. Your desire to be the center of attention might overshadow the contributions of others, leading them to feel undervalued or ignored. Additionally, your tendency to avoid deeper, more serious conversations can prevent you from forming truly meaningful connections, leaving friends feeling like they don’t truly know you
Tips for Peacocks: While your outgoing nature is a gift, try making room for others to shine. Be mindful of including quieter friends in conversations and giving them the space to express themselves. Consider diving into deeper topics occasionally to foster stronger emotional connections and help your friends feel more understood. Don’t hesitate to step back from the spotlight from time to time.
The DOLPHIN: The friendly, nurturing connector
As a dolphin, you embody warmth and friendliness, often acting as the glue in your social circles. You thrive on emotional connections and prioritize harmony in your relationships. At your best, you’re a supportive, caring, and playful friend. Your natural ability to empathize with others makes you an excellent listener, and your nurturing nature allows your friends to feel safe and valued. However, you can sometimes become overly accommodating, putting others’ needs before your own and neglecting your own boundaries. Your sensitivity to conflict may lead you to avoid difficult conversations, leaving issues unresolved. Additionally, your desire to please everyone might make it challenging for you to express your own opinions or needs, leading to feelings of frustration or resentment.
Tips for Dolphins:
While your nurturing nature is a wonderful asset, remember to prioritize your own needs and set healthy boundaries. Practice self-care to maintain your emotional energy, and don’t shy away from expressing your thoughts. Embrace the idea that it’s okay to disagree; healthy conflict can lead to stronger relationships. Lastly, try to balance your tendency to please others by making time for activities that bring you joy, allowing you to recharge and maintain your own happiness.
So, which animal chronotype resonates with you? Personally, I align with the Owl; I prefer to listen and observe before diving in, and I enjoy meaningful conversation. After learning about the animal chronotypes, I realized it’s important for me to practice engaging in discussions with my friends more spontaneously, and to try to share more about myself.
As you reflect on how you connect with others, remember that understanding your personality type can be the first step toward growth. If you're curious about how these insights can improve your relationships or navigate challenges, reach out to our client care coordinator today to find the right therapist to support your journey toward deeper connections and self-discovery.
Warmly,
Kalie Pham, AMFT
