You may have learned what to do or say to make things go smoother. You may have learned what behaviors or attitudes made people stay. You learned what made you easier to accept.
And slowly, those lessons became automatic.
People with high-functioning anxiety often look very successful in maintaining their jobs, academics, parenthood, and other roles, yet internally are struggling with self-doubt, self-criticism, perfectionism, imposter syndrome, and persistent feelings of stress and being "on edge." High-functioning anxiety can affect people from any background, socioeconomic status, racial and gender identity, etc., and thus can present in each individual differently.
The dependency on love to ultimately feel good about ourselves today is sometimes known as codependency or love addiction, and has become normalized in our society, especially in context to monogamous romantic relationships.
Attachment styles are not your identity, but rather patterns for how your nervous system learned to keep you safe.
To pause does not mean to avoid, withdraw, dismiss, or ignore your partner's feelings. In fact, it signals, “I care enough to truly listen to what you have to say, but my brain isn’t in the right place to do that right now”.
People with high-functioning anxiety often look very successful in maintaining their jobs, academics, parenthood, and other roles, yet internally are struggling with self-doubt, self-criticism, perfectionism, imposter syndrome, and persistent feelings of stress and being "on edge." High-functioning anxiety can affect people from any background, socioeconomic status, racial and gender identity, etc., and thus can present in each individual differently.
Most of us have heard of toxic positivity at some point; the pressure to stay upbeat and ignore difficult emotions, even if it's more honest to feel and express them. Of course, we would love to appear and feel positive all the time, but what really are the impacts of always putting on a smile?
