Many people expect that a steady, responsive, emotionally available partner will automatically feel calming. Instead, many people feel tense or suspicious when someone shows up in a genuinely healthy way. This isn’t a personality flaw, it’s a predictable attachment and nervous system response. So why is this?
My bag only gets stuck on the door handle when I’m having a bad day. Everyone is super annoying when I’m grumpy. My friend’s irritating boyfriend breathes too loudly. When I’m feeling happy it’s easier to find joy in the smaller everyday moments. Does my inner monologue resonate with you?
Shame can be one of the most painful and overpowering emotions in the human experience. It can feel intense, overwhelming, and really hard to talk about. Some people believe both guilt and shame are useful emotions that keep us aligned with our values.
When it comes to the holiday season, food is often at the center of the festivities. Throughout history, food has been one of the primary representations of culture, class, comfort, family, and love. With so much food quite literally on the table, it can be easy to fall into whatever habits you may have around food or body image. Whatever your pattern or struggle, Intuitive Eating could be a welcome practice this holiday season.
Whether your loss is recent or something you’ve carried for years, this season can make it especially hard to feel the joy and rest everyone seems to talk about or expect. It can also be hard to identify when grief emerges as it can take on many forms, often showing up quietly at first. When grief rises like this, it can help to shift from resisting it to making space for it. Here are five ways to let go of the metaphorical tug-of-war rope and gently manage grief this holiday season
Many people expect that a steady, responsive, emotionally available partner will automatically feel calming. Instead, many people feel tense or suspicious when someone shows up in a genuinely healthy way. This isn’t a personality flaw, it’s a predictable attachment and nervous system response. So why is this?
My bag only gets stuck on the door handle when I’m having a bad day. Everyone is super annoying when I’m grumpy. My friend’s irritating boyfriend breathes too loudly. When I’m feeling happy it’s easier to find joy in the smaller everyday moments. Does my inner monologue resonate with you?
Emotional safety is the core foundation in relationships. It’s vital for building trust, vulnerability and intentional connection. This foundation allows you to show up authentically in your relationships, and it also allows you to do so without fear of being judged or rejected.
When most couples are in conflict, they often get stuck in a cycle of trying to win, rather than trying to understand each other. The fight escalates because we don’t feel heard. And when we don’t feel heard, we protect ourselves, by defending, explaining, or shutting down.
In therapy, I frequently work with couples who have focused on togetherness and might have neglected separateness, or vice versa. We can spend so much time and energy strengthening our relationships that our own individuation can get neglected. Here’s some of what I’ve learned from working with couples
Entering a long-distance relationship often feels like an emotional whirlwind - anxiety, worry, sadness, excitement. Whether you’re beginning your relationship long-distance or transitioning into it, the experience can be a major adjustment.
When previously romantic long distance relationships depended on idealization, pining, and pen-pal style correspondences, these days, LDRs contain as many emotional, logistical, and relational challenges as more geographically convenient connections, compounded by the added variable of physical distance. Because of this growing access to romantic partners across the world, long distance relationship advice, support, and communication tips for couples navigating love across the globe have never been more needed.
Does taking the plunge into couples therapy feel a bit exciting, yet also intimidating? If that’s the case, you’re not alone and that feeling is actually very common. This is an experience that can really test you and your relationship, while also strengthening it in a way you’ve always wanted.
When people think about repair in relationships, they often picture big conversations or emotional apologies. But most repair attempts are quieter than that. They’re easy to miss. They live in moments of tension when one partner reaches out, not with words, but with a shift in tone, a glance, a hesitant gesture.
And often, these moments fail not because they’re rejected, but because they’re unnoticed.
