When survival quiets down, what’s left can feel unfamiliar. It’s strange to not always be scanning for danger. Strange to have choices instead of reflexes. Strange to realize that peace can feel unsafe when you’ve never had it before. This is the part of healing no one warns you about, the part that’s less “liberation” and more “relearning how to live.”
When most couples are in conflict, they often get stuck in a cycle of trying to win, rather than trying to understand each other. The fight escalates because we don’t feel heard. And when we don’t feel heard, we protect ourselves, by defending, explaining, or shutting down.
Have you ever cried on your birthday? If so, you’re clearly not alone. So why is that? And why do so many of us have such complicated relationships with our birthdays? Some people thrive, dedicating an entire month to celebrations and gatherings. Others prefer to let the day pass by without acknowledgement.
One of the reasons why conflict becomes so dangerous and unruly in relationships is due to the heightened emotionality of each person and the natural defensive and retaliatory responses elicited. In other words, when we hurl our raw, level 10 emotions at another person during conflict, it will most likely be met by more heightened emotion, defensiveness, or even complete emotional withdrawal or shut down.
Somatic therapy is based on the understanding that emotions don’t just live in our minds—they show up in our bodies too. Talking about how we feel can bring clarity, but sometimes the body needs to release what it’s been holding. Somatic therapy gives space for that release, helping you connect mind and body in the healing process.
Navigating grief can feel like a journey without a map; perplexing, lonely, and disorienting. It doesn’t have a linear timeline. You might cycle through stages, jump back and forth, or even skip some altogether. While each person’s grief looks and feels different, there are certain stages of grief that most individuals experience at some point or another.
Working with someone who just gets under your skin can be incredibly tough. Here are a few strategies that might help you manage your frustration:
We often seek validation from others when we feel vulnerable, believing that external reassurance will quiet our inner critic. But the truth is, while reassurance from others can provide temporary relief, the most enduring compassion comes from within. Listening to and elevating the voice of our inner advocate is the most effective way to challenge negative self-talk and increase self-compassion.
The word confidence comes from the Latin breakdown of the word: con' (with) and 'fidere' (trust). In essence, confidence is a trust in yourself. In order for others to witness you as a person with confidence, you must first develop that trust in yourself.
When we think of ADHD, the more recognized symptoms of inattentiveness and hyperactivity come to mind. While these are core aspects of the disorder, many other symptoms and traits can go unnoticed. These lesser-known manifestations can significantly impact those living with ADHD, yet they’re rarely recognized or discussed.
Words are powerful. Often, their connotation outweighs their denotation. Throughout my learning as a human and as a therapist, I have found three words that stand out for their interpretation in an uncompromisingly negative light. These three words, “Control,” “Anxiety,” and “Ego” certainly do have negative attributes to them, however, they simultaneously have immensely important protective functions.
When it comes to ageism, these beliefs can be incredibly restrictive. For instance, they can prevent people from pursuing new hobbies, career changes, or educational goals. They can also devalue the contributions of individuals, lead them to doubt their abilities, and exclude them from opportunities they are perfectly capable of.
The concept of a “window of tolerance” was coined by psychiatrist Dr. Dan Siegel and describes our optimal zone of arousal. Within this zone of arousal, we can function effectively and manage varying experiences and emotions. Our minds feel clear, we feel competent and capable, and we can process information and emotions.
At its core, EMDR is based on the idea that our brains can process and heal from trauma just like our bodies can heal from physical injuries. However, when a traumatic event occurs, the memory of it can get "stuck," preventing the brain from fully processing it
